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Writer's pictureFaiz Faisal

ILLUMINAKING: Validation


In the age of the social media, validation plays an important role and it has become the only reason someone wants to even live life. All the likes and comments really 'make it' or 'break it' for most people and some people even pushed themselves to life a double life just to be validated by the society.

For me personally, I've seen these people and it is quite shocking on how far they are willing to go just be validated. As for myself, to be validated is a good feeling, especially when you have mountains of insecurities. I'm speaking for those people who never see themselves like how others see them. I mean I'm one of that people who refused to acknowledged a compliment. It is not because we don't appreciate the compliments but it is because we don't see ourselves the way you see us. To some people, this can be translated to attention seeking behavior or the need to be constantly validate, but honestly that is not the case.

I know it annoys people whenever they give us compliments and our usually reply would be 'no I'm not'. My friends used to get irritated with my reply but that is how I really feel. So please don't get mad at us and please understand that we truly appreciate whatever you say about us, it is just that we don't get that a lot and that is why it is kinda difficult for us to process all the nice thing people have to say about us.

Back to the topic of validation, what made us all craving to be validated? That is the question that has been on my mind for the longest time. Why is it important for us to be validated? For me, when a person feels the need to be validated, there's only one reason for it, it is because they are lonely. These people doesn't really have someone that they are close to for them to feel loved and appreciated. That is why they turn to the masses and hoping that they will be accepted and validated.

I used to feel like that in my early 20's but once I found my own people and circle who appreciate me for who I am, I don't feel the need of having people outside my circle to appreciate my existence. So it is important for you to find your own tribe and just live your life with them. When you are too busy wanting to be validated by the masses, you'll start to lose those who are genuinely care for you. What more important is for you to live your truth, let people see the real you and accept you for who you really are.

Or the best you can do it, get yourself to validate yourself! In a simpler word, self-love! That is the best thing one can do for themselves.

P/S: Happy February! Let's welcome the month of love and remember that someone else's insecurites is not something you can joke about!

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