20 year old me couldn't stand being told what to do and would definitely start a fight once someone disagree or attack me. I don't fight physically but I love to fight verbally, emotionally and mentally. I know I'm able to say things that will make people think about their life's worth. I can do that and I did that previously. Sometimes I just go completely silent because silent can hurt people mentally and it is worst than physical pain.
But that was all in the past. 30 year old me would just take the high road and apologize to people and try to resolve the conflict as quickly as possible. Now, I can clearly see and understand why people always say ''Kill them with kindness". I never really tried it before but recently I had a chance to do so, I was having a conflict with a client and he said that I was doing the wrong thing and what not when he was the one who always giving feedback in the very last minute before something supposed to be going live already.
When he texted me and said I was doing 'FOC' job, I was about to flip and dig all his past mistakes that he's done and caused a lot of trouble to me and my team. As I was about to hit send, I suddenly realized that there's no point to stoop to their level. Be more mature and forgiving because I know the real story and I don't owe him any explanation for his behavior. So instead of lashing out at him, I apologize that he find my quality of work to be not up to par and had caused him so much trouble.
He stopped and suddenly he changed his tone, his replies are now more subtle and he ended the conversation with a suggestion on how the communication could be improved.
I wonder how it would be like if I did hit send and lash out at him. It would've been ugly and I'd probably lost my job as well. So yeah, always kill people with kindness.
P/S: We're best friends now!
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